As we approach the one-third mark of the PB+1 Challenge, which will see us eat some form of a peanut butter sandwich (plus one additional ingredient) for lunch every day for the entire month of October, we'll admit that our love for the crunchy/creamy goodness of peanut butter was waning just a bit. It's the most peanut butter we've eaten over the course of a nine-day period since kindergarten and the go-to PB partners--banana and jam--were getting a little tired.

Then Miracle Whip lived up to its hyperbolic name.

If you're not familiar with Miracle Whip, it's a tangy salad dressing, sandwich spread and mayonaise substitute made by Kraft Foods. Lower in fat and calories than plain old mayo, Miracle Whip is inexplicably a big deal not only in Midwest cuisine but also in the South, two regions that take great pride in maintaining their fat and calories.

Well, in addition to being a steady compliment to bologna and the secret indgredient to countless casseroles, it turns out that Miracle Whip plays off of peanut butter like Karl Malone and John Stockton running a pick-and-roll.

Yeah, yeah, it sounds wretched. We get that. But you just have to trust us when we tell you that peanut butter and Miracle Whip sandwiches are the cat's ass. We had a peanut butter and bacon sandwich on Tuesday that was decent, but would have been a 550-foot home run if Miracle Whip were introduced. Of course that would be a mortal sin under the guidelines of this contest. 

So pick up a jar of Miracle Whip and try a dab on your next peanut butter sandwich. If you don't like it, you can use the remainder of the salad dressing in a batch of tuna hotdish:

2 bags egg noodles (found in the frozen aisle, probably near the bread dough)

2 cans albacore tuna (don't cheap out with chunk light)

2 cans cream of chicken/mushroom soup

1 can LeSueur early sweet peas (yes, we're brand specific)

12 oz shredded cheddar cheese

2/3 cup of Miracle Whip

1 bag of potato chips (preferably ruffled)

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Cook noodles and combine with tuna, soup, peas, cheese, and salad dressing. Add salt, pepper, a thrust or six of hot sauce and a couple of squeezes of lemon juice. Pour the cement-like mixture into casserole dish and bake 25 minutes at 350 degrees. Remove from oven and add crunched-up chips as a topping, then bake for another 20-25 minutes. Don't let the chips burn or the casserole will surely suffer.

To kick it up a notch, serve with Sriracha Thai chili sauce.

"Top Chef: Las Vegas" was back and better than ever last night, giving us more drama at Judges' Table than we've seen in two seasons' worth of episodes. For the first time this season, the Bottom contained four chefs we didn't want to see go, even if one had proven he/she doesn't really belong.

But more on that later.

There were some pretty big reveals to open the show. First, we learned that favorite Michael Voltaggio has two daughters at home. This was a bit of a shocker because he strikes us as a bit of a nomadic bachelor who is all about his career and chicks, and not necessarily in that order. Guess you can't judge a book by its tattooed and perfectly coiffed cover. He said that he's under a lot of pressure to do well in the show to justify spending so much time away from his children. [tear]

We also learned that Ash never went to culinary school. This wasn't as much of a surprise considering he's been completely overmatched by the more classically trained competitors. He likes to say, "I know I can cook good food," which is code for, "I don't have the resume to be here and I'm feeling pretty self-conscious about it." Ash is a nice guy but he's never been in the Top of any challenge and he's been extremely fortunate to make it as far as he has. Even he admitted as much.

As the chefs prepared to head to the Top Chef Kitchen, we found out that Jen was sick as a dog and feeling none too confident despite her usual tough-as-friggin-nails demeanor. Really, who wants to eat much less cook when they are sick? What a bad break for a chef who we consider a favorite to make the final show and maybe even win the whole thing. Hope she wears gloves (she did).

For the High Stakes Quickfire Challenge, guest judge and Food Network star Tyler Florence (always outstanding) had the chefs make a dish that incorporates three key words (mood, cuisine, taste/texture) assigned by a slot machine. Ash said he'd choose Broke, Lazy and Spicy as his words. Great line.

The slot machine was kind to some (Mike V. got Adventurous, Tangy and Asian) and absolutely brutal to others (Ashley drew Blue, Cheesy and Middle Eastern... WTF?). It should also be mentioned that three chefs drew Umami as a taste/texture. We must admit that we had no knowledge of Umami until Michael Isabella explained that it's a "fifth" flavor that is neither salty, sour, sweet nor spicy. Eli added that it's an "earthy flavor," which is probably why he bogarted the mushrooms.

The challenge threw some chefs off of their games; sick Jen was a Negative Nancy and said mood should never play into your food and both Mike I. and Kevin (who drew Stressed, Hot and Spicy Asian) admitted that they'd never before cooked Asian food. Florence was pretty forgiving with everyone except Robin, who used curry oil in her Middle Eastern bean hash (curry is so not Middle Eastern, as Padma pointed out). He even praised Ashley for her halibut with lemon foam even though it looked like ass. Kevin got the win for his pork with Vietnamese salad and since this was a High Stakes Quickfire, the Ginger Bear got the option of taking $15K from the M Resort or immunity. He wisely chose the dough because A) He's not at-risk to go home at this point in the competition and B) As Ashley pointed out, at the end of the day the chefs want to "live or die" because their food is good, not because they have immunity.

For the Elimination Challenge, the chefs were paired into teams to cook a family-style dinner for the judges back at the house. Florence was joined by food heavies and restauranteurs Nancy Silverton, Govino Armstrong, Tom Douglas and Takashi Yagihashi as each judge gave the teams a grab bag of different ingredients to cook with. When the chefs drew knives for teams, Mike I. had his worst nightmare realized and was paired with Robin. In another challenge wrinkle, the teams had to find a place to cook in tight quarters. There's only so much kitchen space so Mike V. and Ash set up a kitchen on the dining room table, Mike I. and Robin made camp by the patio and Ashley and Eli took the barbecue area.

While some teams really worked well together, alpha dogs Mike I. and Mike V. imposed their will on their partners. Despite Robin's knowledge of Asian cuisine, Mike I. took nothing she said seriously simply because he can't stand her personally. Bad strategy. Mike V., meanwhile, dimissed Ash as a "No. 2" and basically used him as his soux chef. His plan to use a wok to cook ravioli and a tabletop skillet to cook fish backfired bigtime when they tripped a circuit breaker. As Mike V. said, you can't start cooking fish, then stop, then restart because the fish will be overcooked and tough.

Ashley and Eli had their own problems. They were cooking delicate prawns in the dark on the grill and Ashley's homemade gnocchi came out extremely salty. But their beets looked awesome. Laurine and Bryan had the best-looking dish with a pan roasted halibut served over a corn cake. Kevin and Jen also breezed through the challenge with their kobe beef in tomato and ginger broth.

Ashley and Eli's prawns came back undercooked and the judges unanimously dissed the salty gnocchi. Can't sautee gnocchi and retain its integrity, chef Armstrong said. Apparently, gnocchi has integrity... who knew? Robin and Mike I's tuna went over very well but Tom noted that the dish was successful despite the team being wholly dysfuntional and Mike being a bit of an a-hole.

Kevin/Jen and Laurine/Bryan were voted into the Top, with Jen's tomato and ginger broth earning her a $10,000 gift card to Macy's. "Kevin will probably get a nice suit out of this," she said. Well played, Sicko.

The judges thrust Mike V/Ash and Ashley/Eli into the Bottom and Mike V. took it incredibly hard. You could really tell how much this means to him as he sat in the corner with his head burried in his arms during final deliberations. We also got the first glimpse of brotherly love between the Voltaggios. While Michael was at Judges' Table, Bryan snapped at Kevin when Kevin openly critiqued Mike V.'s choices. "I'm sick of dissecting everyone's dishes," Bryan said. "Did you try the dish? No, you didn't."

At Judges' Table, Mike V. took full responsibility for the overcooked fish but Ash threw himself under the bus by telling anyone who would listen that Mike V. is the greatest chef alive (the Picasso comparison was a bit much, no?), almost begging the judges to put him out to pasture instead. Was Ash crushing on Mike V.? Perhaps, but we think he just realized that he has no longterm future in the contest whereas Mike V. can win it. Noble gesture, really.

In the end though, Ashley got the boot for the poor prawns and gnarly gnocchi. She had the chance to blame Eli for the salty pasta but took the High Road. Too bad, because we really think she could have been a factor down the stretch.

In Fantasy Top Chef, the episode proved bittersweet for Brandon, who lost Ashley but earned huge points for Jen's win. TFP got paid for Kevin's Quickfire victory.

It's only Day 5 and already we felt the need to spice up the Challenge.

Enter P.B. loco.

Our friend Mineko tipped us off to P.B. loco's presence here in the Valley. Apparently, they've had a store in Fashion Square Mall for the past four years; but of course we weren't all that interested in gourmet peanut butter prior to Oct. 1. You really should check them out next time you're in the Nordstrom wing of the mall (third level).

Proprietor Julie was quite interested in our Challenge and asked to be kept appraised of any new developments (kidney failure, dysentery, open sores). She even scribbled down the URL for this here blog. Do we smell an exclusive sponsorship deal in the offing?? In addition to letting us sample any and all flavors of her trans-fat free PBs (Sumatra Cinnamon Raisin is the cat's ass, with Chocolate-Chip Cookie Dough coming in a close second), Julie informed us that peanut butter is pretty much God's food. Not only is peanut butter an ideal source for monounsaturated fats and loaded with protein and fiber, but it also contains significant amounts of phytosterols, which are believed to protect the heart against cancer and ward off evil spirits. It's also been named a Top Bait by Rat Trap Monthly.

It was a arduous decision but we opted for the Asian Curry Spice, partly because we wanted to pair the spread with some chicken but mostly because we really want to make a mess of Kenneth's Curried Shrimp Stir Fry. Seriously, how good does that sound?

Day 5 Meal: Since we neglected to buy chicken, we made a quick peanut butter and banana number on whole wheat, which did its job quite nicely. Probably best that we kept it simple because the Queen is cooking up some Mexican casserole for tonight's Packers v. Vikings death match (SKOL!). Grade: A-

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In an unrelated note, we bumped into the Partizan men's basketball club  of Euroleague Basketball at Foot Locker. The Serbs are in town to play the Suns on Tuesday and are coming off a 102-70 thrashing at the hands of the Nuggets. We asked the shortest Partizan player we could find (possibly Petar Brozic) which Suns player he was most looking forward to playing against and he mumbled, "We fear no American." Whatever, Drago. Nash is Canadian. Anyway, before we could ask the team to friend us on Facebook they left the store with about 20 pairs of shoes. Good luck, fellas.

For Day 2 of the PB+1 Challenge, we packed a picnic lunch and ascended up historic Camelback Mountain. Our goals for the hike were modest: 1) Get a nice shot of the meal with a desert backdrop; 2) Infuse our pasty Welsh skin with some much-needed color; and, most importantly, 3) Don't suffer serious injury or fall to our death. It is kickball night, after all, and taking the mound for Big In Japan would be extremely difficult wearing a body cast.

We listened to Pearl Jam's Backspacer on the way up and the record provided the perfect soundtrack. "Breathing hard, making hay," Eddie sings in "Unthought Known." Word, Eddie. Word.

Day 2 Meal (pictured): Peanut butter and blackberry jam on whole wheat, along with an apple, Toy Story fruit snacks, a peanut butter granola bar (overkill) and some water. We didn't get to the apple, fruit snacks or granola bar. Good thing, because we probably would have puked on the way down. But the sandwich sure gave us the right amount of fuel to finish the workout. Two days down, 29 to go. Grade: B+